I like surprises sometimes … :)

•April 13, 2012 • 1 Comment

So I’ve been missing in action. My excuse is that they took away our Internet access at work and it’s the only time when I have absolutely nothing to do and time to sit here and write. But now that I’ve quit, I don’t really care anymore so I’m going online again. 😉 Next friday is my absolutely last day at work and my last day ever working nights. I seriously can’t wait because I’ve been sleeping all of like 2 hours a day and that’s just not enough.

So about the weight loss, I haven’t been following my goals much, to be honest. I went on like three trips with my ex boyfriend (ex since yesterday… still seeing how that will work out but that’s not all that relevant I suppose) and to several parties and I just haven’t been watching my water intake nor what I’ve been eating.

A couple of weeks ago (around 2 or so) I stood on the scale and actually weighed around 74.3kg again, which kind of scared me. Ouch.

So imagine my surprised when I checked yesterday and saw 71.8 and again this morning and it was at 71.6 (157.8 lbs) …. 🙂 maybe the best way to lose weight isn’t completely losing my appetite because of relationship problems, but it clearly worked somehow. I think officially I have around 10 lbs to go now. 4.6kg. Doesn’t seem like all that much since there are nearly 2 months left to complete the challenge. 😀 My closest goal right now is get under the 70kg mark.

My problem at the moment is that I should probably start eating better. The day before yesterdayI had an apple but only because I had to eat something, not because I was hungry. Yesterday I had a sandwich at work at around 7am, then at maybe 5pm just a tiny bit of tomato with honey mustard dressing and in the evening I went out to eat with my mom but I couldn’t eat more than 2 small meatballs. I’m starting to feel better about everything, really, so maybe my appetite will come back soon. It’s funny how emotional states can sometimes affect our appetite so much.

I’m planning to go to the grocery store today to stock up on some veggies and fresh produce today to make a nice salad or something of the sort.

I don’t know if I’ll be able to post before next friday because I will most likely be training the person who will be taking my place at work and at home I’m usually way too beat to sit down at the computer and write, but after next friday, my daytime life will start again. I’m super excited. I can actually start exercising again, too! 😀

I’m going to make a neat list like Blu for my goals until the end of April:

  • Hit the 70kg mark
  • Start exercising
  • Start eating healthy again
  • Ideally hit around 69kg – it’s only 2.6kg away and there are 2.5 weeks left in April. 🙂

Omg weekends.

•March 12, 2012 • 2 Comments

So to recap the weekend… I think I mastered it quite well, actually. I wasn’t all that strict… I had maybe 10 pieces of Doritos (yeah … I know wtf) and some Tostadas with my seafood dish on saturday, but all in all I was good. I didn’t even go out (totally not planned, there were some security issues in my city so nobody really went out… again wtf.) so there was no temptation to have a couple of beers – I saved quite a few calories there.

I went out to eat with my mom on saturday and had a bit of shrimp cocktail (really nothing in it apart from raw shrimp, a lemon/chili sauce, cucumbers and red onions as well as some spicey steamed shrimp. I didn’t eat the rice but had the steamed veggies and ate some Tostadas (I think 2) with my food.

Then I ate tuna salad that night and on sunday we had a chicken/tomato/onion/chipotle dish, again with 2 Tostadas. We buy the fat-free kind, so I suppose it’s not too bad. 😀

So yeah, all in all I was good this weekend. No cookies, cakes etc. Just a couple of more carbs than I should have eaten, but it could have been worse.

I haven’t weighed myself since friday, but I feel like I haven’t really lost anything since. Maybe I’ll check later when I get home from work to see where I’m at.

What I’ve been REALLY good at is the water. The lemon water is doing the trick, as well as chilled green tea 😀 I’ve been filling my little container up everytime it’s empty and I’ve been having 3 – 4 or more of those a day. The bottle holds 3/4 litres. Altogether that would be around 3 litres which is more than I thought I could ever drink. It’s helping me with not feeling hungry and the fact that I always have something to sip on is preventing me from feeling bored and eating out of boredom.

I still need to figure out how to start doing a good exercise routine. I’ve been doing a couple of small exercises but I know it’s nothing that will make a difference. If anybody has any good sites or videos or whatnot that are great for starting out, I would really appreciate it.

They’re testing me… I know it!

•March 9, 2012 • 4 Comments

So coming into work today, the first thing I see is pizza. D: A co-worker decided he would bring pizza for everybody. Another one decided to bring croissants. So who told these guys about my plan and why are they trying to ruin it?? Ahh!

I’m not even that much of a pizza/croissant love, but when you had some veggies for dinner and come into work hungry and smell pizza? ……….OMG. So I’m sitting here smelling pizza and dying a little bit inside. But I brought cereal for breakfast and I’m sure they’ll all be jealous later when I pull it out. Ha.

I was sorely tempted to just have a small piece, but honestly I’ve been doing so good, so why ruin it now? I just want to lose the weight I said I would lose in the time frame Blu and I set for ourselves. 😀 I think it’s completely doable and not having that piece of pizza isn’t the end of the world. Pizza will still exist when all my weight is gone so I can have a piece of it then 😉

I’m not 100% limiting myself on anything that tastes good, the thing is that I’m going to a friend’s house for lunch on sunday and I’m pretty sure it won’t all be veggies and dip. So I declare sunday my fun food day. 😀

My boy is gone for work in a city 5 hours from here and I haven’t seen him in nearly 3 weeks now (3 wks on sunday ahh!) and I just found out today that he won’t be coming back until tuesday/wednesday. -.- While on one hand I miss him like crazy (we haven’t been dating for all that long so 3 weeks feels like an eternity) I think it’s giving me time to focus on this and to start out without the temptation of going out for dinner or for some drinks. Still … I hope they get done with everything and he will be back on tuesday. He will have to be here on saturday latest because we leave to spend the weekend in the mountains with some friends.

That’s another thing that’s going to be difficult … but maybe I’ll just take it easy for that weekend with the strict diet because after all it’s not about not having any fun at all, right?

Anyway, at the moment I’m really proud of myself for resisting pizza and croissants, especially considering that the croissants came with an amazing-looking caramel sauce. Oh man.

Couldn’t resist peeking …

•March 8, 2012 • 2 Comments

So I wasn’t going to weigh myself until tomorrow, but I couldn’t resist it. I’ve been doing good, so I figured I should know where I’m at. Surprise … I’m at 73.4 kg (161.5 lbs). I was pretty sure that I was at 75 kg (165 lbs) but seeing that I’m a lot closer to my goal than I thought really motivated me. So much that I was able to resist the open bag of Doritos in the pantry and made veggies instead. Ha. Take that, chippies.

Today I had cereal and milk coffee for breakfast and actually avoided having the multigrain bars. I figured since I was having carbs for breakfast already I didn’t need to have extra by having the bars. So I drank a litre of diet coke instead. Facepalm. Oh, well… I’m slowly replacing that with lemon water now, so I suppose I need to take baby steps here 😉 an addiction isn’t cured in a day!

When I got home I made my lemon water and stuffed it in the fridge, made tuna salad and had half a can of tuna with a pita bread and then went to sleep. Woke up around 4 hours later because I have an amazing sleeping rhythm ever since I started working the night shift and was hungry again, craving those damn Doritos again. This is when I was able to successfully ignore them and made veggies instead. I still have half my tuna salad and a pita that I think I will eat now because for some reason I’m hungry today.

I’m really happy about being lower in weight than I thought 😀 it’s motivating to see the numbers going down – makes me want to go on and keep to the loose diet I’ve set for myself. I’m really not the kind of person who easily sticks to diets. The Hollywood Diet, Atkins and whatnot … I don’t know. I think I’m just going to stick to eating healthy food and avoiding eating more carbs than I have to as well as leaving out the sweets. Oh yeah and trying to get some workouts in despite my being exhausted constantly because I just don’t know how to sleep with this shift.

As the weekend approaches, I’m kind of feeling a little scared about going out. I love beer D: but clearly beer is off the list, at least in large quantities. So maybe a suitable alternative is whiskey with mineral water or something like that. I also have an invitation to lunch at a friend’s house on sunday so I suppose either sunday will be my YAY FREEDOM day or I’ll just eat small portions. After all it’s not about limiting myself 100% – life still has to be enjoyable. 😉

Anyway … tuna, here I come! 😀

Boredom …

•March 7, 2012 • 2 Comments

…makes me want to eat. I think I’m not alone and a lot of people probably have this problem, but it’s annoying. I’ve been sitting at work and haven’t had anything to do since 4am (it’s 6:30 now) and all I want to do is go to the vending machine and get something to nibble on. I brought cereal for breakfast so I’ve been stealing a little bit of that since I was going to eat it later anyway. I didn’t have time to prepare a snack, but I think tomorrow I’m bringing some raw veggies to chew on if I get bored again.

I decided to stray from my usual salad and go with a bit of Special K cereal today for breakfast and the tupperware with my cereal is sitting on my desk flirting with me. Can it be 7 yet?

I’ve been thinking about taking some before and after pictures. I think I’ll take that on when I get home later. I have some before before before pictures from when I started losing weight, but I’m not sure I’m brave enough to post them. I’m not even sure I’m brave enough to look at them myself. I was flicking through iPhoto the other day and stumbled upon an old old picture from when I was at my peak weight. 126kg (277 lbs) … D:  I was sorely tempted to delete it but decided it would probably be a good idea to keep it as a reminder to never let it get to that again.

I really wish I’d cut up some cucumber now. Fail.

Day 2 … doesn’t seem so impossible … yet ;)

•March 6, 2012 • 2 Comments

I made it through day 1 without cheating! That sadly really is a hard thing for me because I love sweets. And when I say love I mean LOVE in uppercase and blinking neon letters. I could probably live off of Skittles, Chocolate and co. for quite a long time before I start missing real food. But no, those are completely off my list for the moment. I’m already through half my day (finished work, yay!) and I’ve had 2 multigrain bars (95 calories each) and a veggie salad (same as yesterday). What I’m still struggling with is water – I just don’t really get all that thirsty so I tend to forget to drink. I’m going to have to get a water bottle and prepared some sugarless flavoured drink and carry it with me everywhere so I don’t forget. I’m totally aware that this weight loss thing would go a lot quicker if I just drank my 3 – 4 liters of water a day.

Work was way better than yesterday today… I actually had a couple of moments to breathe! Yesterday a work friend of mine couldn’t come, so I had to cover her and do her work, which resulted in me staying an hour longer than I had to in order to finish everything. Luckily she felt better today and was able to come, making my day a lot easier.

So I have these pills a friend gave me to try – they’re called Demograss. According to her it’s supposed to clean your system and help you lose weight in the process. I’ve been scared of trying them because she mentioned that the first two weeks there could be side effects… and I researched them online and found varying opinions. Some people have had bad experiences and some have had good results. I suppose it’s like that with everything because our bodies are all different and react to things differently so I’m really unsure of whether to try them or not. The ingredients seem to be natural, but again… I don’t know. I’ll think about it.

My boyfriend is gone for work for another week (it’s already been two weeks!) and I miss him a lot – yet I think it’s giving me time to start this out right and get into it and used to it before he comes back and wants to eat at restaurants every second day again. At least I will be in the frame of mind of ordering healthy when he comes back so it won’t be a problem. I might even get him into it… he’s mentioned wanting to lose a couple of pounds himself. Still can’t wait for him to come back and I’m hoping it’s before sunday because a friend invited us over for lunch.

So far I feel really good about this. I haven’t been feeling hungry and the guilt that comes after eating things that are bad for me is gone so that’s a good thing. 🙂

Let’s try this again …

•March 6, 2012 • 5 Comments

I’ve attempted a weight loss blog before… and I don’t quite remember why it didn’t work out. So… let’s try this again. The goal this time is to lose 8kg (~18 lbs) in 3 months.

I haven’t weighed myself and I don’t plan to at the moment because my period just started today and usually I weigh around double what I usually weigh and it will just make me want to drown myself in a big tub of ice cream. So maybe in 3 or 4 days I’ll post my exact weight but if I didn’t lose/gain anything from like 1 or 2 weeks ago I should be at around 74 or 75 kg, which would be around 165 lbs. I’m around 1.65m (5’5”) so ideally I would like to lose another 8 to 10kg. At the moment, however, 18 lbs is the goal – I think that whenever that’s gone whatever is left will go easily.

I don’t eat all that much junk … but working nights kind of has its setbacks. I never know what to eat and when to eat and I’m always tired, so working out is a bit of a challenge. I’ve settled for taking salads to work … that usually consist of cucumber, tomatoes, fat free panela cheese and tuna to which I add a little honey mustard dressing – ready. It’s easy to make and since I eat my “lunch” at 7am it helps eating something not too heavy so I won’t get tired. This has worked for me so far, but the temptation to go to the vending machine and get a cinnamon roll or something like that is kind of high. They added Special K bars and similar multigrain bars to their sortiment lately so that’s going to be my option from now on. Cutting back on the Diet Coke and coffee is also going to help … but considering my obsession with both it’s not going to be easy either.

So far today I’ve had my salad (without tuna today – I was out), 2 Special K bars at work and a veggie mix of corn, peas, carrots and tomato that I seasoned with a little bit of butter, lemon and spices. I was really tempted to make myself a sandwich when I got home but since I decided I would cut back on the carbs this week, I think the 2 bars I had this morning were enough. I don’t know what I will have for dinner yet… but most likely the rest of the veggies. I also know that I should try and get some exercise in so I will probably do that right now after I finish posting this. I saw some apps for the iPhone that are supposed to be pretty good to get a half decent home workout in. I don’t have a wii or anything like that so that will have to go for now. I really want to switch to a daytime shift to have the energy to get some walking in and whatnot. :/ Or maybe I just need to fix my sleeping patterns a little. But that’s easier said than done, I’ve been trying it for 9 months now.

Anyway… target goal for those 8kg is June 4th, which is right in time for my birthday. 😉

Here’s to losing the weight in the right places, too! It’d better not go from where I’m totally ok with there being some weight.

I’ll add this ticker in the meantime and edit it if I weigh myself and I happen to be completely off …